Fuck Typing

chromatic's post on Perl Roles reminded me that I've wanted for some time to blog about another kind of composition. I call it “fuck typing.” It's kind of like duck typing, only not really. I would explain, but I think that my good friend, Mr. Vinnie Goombatz, will do a much better job. Although if you're squeamish or easily offended, you might want to skip it.

How you doin'? Theory aksed me to talk about fuck typing. It'd be my fuckin' pleasure.

You know how sometimes you're hacking (I love that word, “hacking”) some piece-a shit code, and you're using some cacasenno's module, but it doesn't quite do what you fuckin' want it to do?

Here's what you say, you say, “Oh, you don't fuckin' want to gimme a fuckin' prosciutto method? You got a fuckin' problem? 'Cause you're about to have a fuckin' problem, know what I'm sayin'?”

I tellya what ya gonna do. You gonna fuckin' open up that fuckin' paisano's module, right there, just fuckin' cut it right open, and then you gonna fuckin' shove the a prosciutto method right into the module's fuckin' guts. “How do you like them apples, you fuckin' piece of shit?”

And that's what you do. You fuckin' show him who's boss, know what I'm sayin'? If you don't get the fuckin' interface you need, you fuck the module up until you get it. Ain't no big fuckin' deal. Nice doin' biznizz wit'chou.

What's surprising to me is how accepted this sort of bad behavior is in some communities. Oh, well, there are all kinds, I guess.

Backtalk

John wrote:

C++ refugees

Some people are just so happy to be able to jam new code and symbols into other namespaces that they joy overwhelms any desire to dwell on the wisdom of doing so. I call it the My First Dynamic Language syndrome.

Theory wrote:

Re: C++ Refugees

@John—

Not a bad name for it. I have to admit that I‘ve actually found fuck typing very useful at times, for example to address the shortcomings of certain recalcitrant libraries. In that case, I think it makes sense to sort of rough them up a bit to get the proper behavior.

—Theory